Unify
完整
吳星瑩
.
「我是茶，也是茶杯，充滿自己，承接自己。」
～《內在森林》小葉欖仁植物誌～
「我坦然需要，然後，坦然給予自己。
不需要完美，我需要完整。」～《蒔：心靈時曆‧時映》
.
我把所有不敢承認的，都壓抑下來。
壓抑看似有效，卻如影隨形著反彈。我只能也壓抑著反彈。
直到我發現自己越來越無力，越來越無法動彈。
因為，我把所有的力量，都用來和自己對抗了。
直到我越來越找不到自己，因為，我把那些自己都當作敵人了，我拚命驅逐著自己。
我不允許自己擁有的，我都期待你來滿足，我都渴望你能補償。你卻從無法帶回給我，長久被我遺棄的自己。
我所缺憾的，從來都只有我能療癒。始終只有我能當自己的醫生，只要我不再用手術刀傷害自己，也不再用繃帶束縛自己。
當我懂得如何犀利，我才終於懂得如何溫柔。
.
I've been suppressing emotions I don't want to feel.
The suppression always works, with the rebound though. I can only try to bottle all up inside me.
Hardly am I able to stir anymore, with the bottle stuffed full.
Almost all my strength have been spent on resisting myself.
Hardly am I able to feel myself anymore, for I look on myself as enemies to deport.
I feel both choked and hollow inside. But you can never save me from depression due to my own suppression.
You can never heal my wounds, only if I don't cut myself with the scalpel, yet not chain myself with the bandage anymore. I learn to be my own doctor properly.
Using both the sharp and the gentle side appropriately, I unify myself.
.
5 days after Grain in Ear: Integrating
KEYWORD
by Singing Wu
by Singing Wu
.
.
.